"...Of shoes and ships and sealing wax, Of cabbages and kings. And why the sea is boiling hot, And whether pigs have wings."
Why not start off a blog with on of my favorite lines from one of my favorite stories. Alice in Wonderland. It pretty much sums up the essence of this blog. For I have a lot to say, a lot to share, a lot to talk about. So this is your warning, you do not have to read it all.
So, I'm going to start with elaborating on my last days of my 30 days of thankful(since I missed it) I know it was way back in November, but I have it on my heart to share. You'll find out why I missed it soon enough.
I have really missed my blog!
So I left off at day 26. For Brokenness. Monday the 26th, I was ready to quit at everything. I was overwhelmed and frustrated and just ready to stop. I was so tired of school and had completely screwed up on a few things, as well as failed my math test. I had bills to pay and no money, haven't even started a single bit of Christmas shopping or even done my Christmas Cards yet. I had Jared starting the hardest week of his recruit school(his last week) and I have hardly seen him all month(well, I've seen him, but seeing him and actually being able to sit down and talk to him about life is two different things). I was really just struggling with the whole not having me time either. I live in a household of seven, that me time doesn't come very often. There was drama all around of course and 1000000 worries that I really shouldn't have been worrying about. Not to mention I have gained back some of my weight on my waist and haven't been to work outs the whole month... so I feel just GREAT..... and I am battling my sinus crud that I never get rid of. Winter just really kills me. I was so tired and so done. I just cried and cried and went to bed. It was ugly. I didn't elaborate on FB, but I was ready to just be done. Thankfully, I was sane enough that I listened to that little voice that said, "Prayers work." And I took a little pity on myself and asked for some. And then before I cried myself to sleep I just sobbed to God. I was upset and mad and just letting him have it. And that's what I needed to do all along. Yeah, he knows, but he wants to hear it from us. I just wanted Him to make it all better, that I was just so tired and couldn't do this. That I wasn't smart enough or strong enough or confident enough.
God has a way of opening your eyes to many things in life. Tuesday(27th), while sitting in intech training(like a zombie) I decided I would check facebook. Hadn't touched it since last night and really didn't even feel like talking to people or anything, but I looked anyways. God puts every person you know in your life there for a reason. The first thing I checked was my inbox. Now, backing up a bit, I was on like 4 hrs of sleep, but I woke up on time, made it to intech early with coffee and everything(in my favorite pink princess cup), I even looked halfway decent for jeans and a hoodie. I could breath(which is rare these days) and my ride to school was filled with some amazing music on the radio, that just kinda gave me a push. Pretty good morning, unlike the norm. Actually, AMAZING morning that I haven't had in a long time. My school morning since October had been nothing but trouble. Anyways, back to my inbox, I have a message from a former preschool parent, who I haven't talked to in a while, and her message was short and sweet, and exactly what I needed. In her encouragement and prayers for me, she said, "Holly Stockburger is with you, and she has been your inspiration to do everything you have planned for your life." Guess who had to leave the class bc I was about to bawl in front of everyone? But she was right. God had allowed Holly to get me through the morning. It took me a moment to realize that I had not set my alarm the night before, and something woke me up before the time it would usually go off(this NEVER happens, I'm always late. lol). I ironically was wearing pink that day(I know, pink is my favorite, but I don't always wear it that much). The drive to school had played one of the songs from her memorial service, I Will Rise. While digging in my purse for my earrings before going in the building, The pink ribbon I wore for Holly was tangled in my earrings(not bad, just attached.). Tons of little signs, little things that made a difference in my day, that I had really not even payed attention to until after I read that message. Holly would have kicked my tail if she even heard me breathe a word about quitting, or beating myself up the way I was. And I know she taught me, and quite a few other girls, how to fight, how to keep going, how to be strong. She never once let us quit at anything we did, and always made sure we were doing it to our best ability. She knew that God placed a special talent in each of us girls, and reminded us of that. She, like many others I look up to, told me that I am going to be one of the best teachers one day, to keep going. I would never in m life want to disappoint that lady. EVER. Especially, when she is one of the role models that I strive to be like.
The rest of the day I just did a lot of deep thinking. Not only that, but I enjoyed the day. I realized, even though I still wasn't back to 100%, that I was ok. I made it thru that week and I am here on another one. And I had no reason to still be down, because I had so much to be happy about. It was an awesome day. A lot of my friends in block one and myself went to eat together for a sit down lunch and just had a good time finishing out our day with the intech crap(yeah... that was boring). Day 27(the Tuesday that I was just talking about) goes to my Block. I am so thankful for the group of people that I am stuck with for the next year and a half. I get along with almost all of them(there is just one that I don't happen to get along with so well... but he doesn't really get along with anyone... thankfully, he's switching sections. lol) I have made some wonderful friendships and I am blessed to have such a great section to be in. We would not have made it through the semester with anyone else. We all kinda helped each other pass. because we ALL were just dragging right there at the end. I was shown that I definitely was not the only one who felt like giving up. These people are becoming like family, and I wouldn't trade them for the world. I know we can make it. =]
As the week went on, I was slowly healing in my heart, but by Wednesday I felt like I was dying bc of my sinuses. It was a long day at school and then I forgot that I had to teach workouts. Let me remind you again, that I haven't really been the whole month of November just because school was absolutely overtaking every inch of my being. Needless to say, teaching when you feel like poo and when your endurance isn't where it needs to be, SUCKS. lol I felt SO horrible, and kept apologizing to the class. They are precious though. It felt so good to have them be excited for my return and to tell me that they have missed my smiling face. And even though I think the workout wasn't as good as it could have been, they left sweating and said it was great. Day 28 was for the Fitness at Work program. I am so thankful for everyone who comes to be a part of this wonderful program, and for all the other instructors. I realized that becoming a part of this was something that I needed. I feel so much better when I am there, I am having fun and getting healthy and fit. I am learning and teaching(which blows my mind that I haven't been here a year and I am already certified in Zumba and now working towards my AFFA! Diane really has pushed me!) I just feel so good, and I love how I look because of it. I was almost out of all my 9/10s in October. Of course I kept them bc I knew November would kill me. But its going back down. =]
Day 29 was for the one constant in my life, my Lord and Savior. I sit back and think of how far I have come in my life and how I would never have made it if it weren't for His guidance, His strength, His love. I am so amazed at the blessings God has given me, the hard times He has brought me through, the many things He has shown me, and is STILL showing me today. It is still so hard to fathom how someone could love someone like me, even after all the times I have failed. He is always there, no matter how many people enter and leave my life, no matter how many times I am hurting or grieving, no matter how many times I drift off the correct path. What an awesome God we serve. And how amazing will it be to be with Him one day. I know Holly is having the best time. <3
Day 30 was for these 30 days of thanks. A lot of people do this every year, but a lot of people don't get it, and think its silly. There are those who are like "we should be thankful every day of the year, not just one month" yeah, well, can you honestly say that you sit down every day and think of something you are thankful for? I mean really.... come on. I love doing this every year because it makes you more aware of the Lords blessings in your life. It does get you thinking about what all we have to be thankful for and CAN get you in a routine of making this an every day task. Its my challenge to everyone. We all have so much to be thankful for.
Now to catch up on some other life events....
As most of you already know or have figured out from reading my blog, my dear friend and role model Holly Stockburger passed away in October. I cannot even tell you how much it hurt, and still hurts, when I think about her being gone. I miss her every day. She fought so hard against the cancer, and I will never forget being told that she didn't lose the battle, she won. She is no longer suffering, no longer in pain, and she is celebrating on the streets of heaven with our God. I fight my battles every day with the reminder of how she fought. I cannot wait to see her again. And I am so thankful to have her loving family as a part of my life. Especially Chris. He is so precious, and he loved more than anyone can imagine. I am thankful for another wonderful role model in my life. And I will always be thinking about the role model I have watching down on me from heaven. She is my guardian angel, along with a few other girls that I love so much. <3
Speaking of Cancer and how absolutely evil it is, My papa's cancer went in remission end of summer into fall. They found hernia right at the end of his esophagus that we think may be keeping him from completely regaining the strength to swallow(he is swallowing now, but can't swallow many foods). He is on a feeding tube and feels much better, and is still trying new things. I am praying that my family starts asking the right questions and getting him back in to remove the hernia, get rid of feeding tube, and get him back on the road to Vanderbilt like planned to do the blood work they were going to do to make sure he is cancer free(I think they were going to clean it? Its like some major thing). Idk what is going to happen though, bc no one seems concerned about it. But, If you know my family on that side....
My grandpa(dad's dad) found out about 2 months ago that his prostate cancer is back. =[ They are more than likely doing the major surgery for that. I am so not liking any of it but I trust that the Drs know what they are doing. It just makes me nauseous to think about any one going through any thing like this, esp my family.
Switching gears to something not so depressing, I survived my first semester in the Education program!!! ONLY A YEAR AND A HALF LEFT!!! Lord I hope I can make it. We all were ready to throw in the towel right there at the end. You wouldn't believe some if the ridiculous things we have to do(10 page lesson plans included... who does that?!?!) I actually did learn SO much though, and even though I DRED starting on Monday, I am a little excited. =] I miss my mean girls and the fun we have with everyone in our block. I am also ready to see some new teachers. Also happy to have a break from Orenda..... Unfortunately, we will have Kumi again... he is the most unorganized professor I have ever met. He really drove us crazy. Thankfully, he's nice. Just irritating. lol I have to get a move on and order some books and organize my folders. I haven't touched a thing since the last day of class. lol
My sister turned 16 on Dec 21st. Reality set in and I realized that I am old. Old age wise, but not heart wise. lol She is growing up, Andrew is growing up, and Michael is pretty much grown up(although, like myself, we both still have areas that we need to grow up in. lol) I have been looking through pictures of when we were younger and its like where did it all go? Remember when life was that simple, that fun? I miss it. And I love the time that I get to spend with them now. We have played epic battles of Mario Kart over the break. I LOVE it.
Sometimes it makes me want to go back to when I was young, but then I think about all the wonderful things I have to look forward to. A degree, a real job, marriage, a place of our own, children of our own. <3 Yes, I have full blown wedding fever. and Jared has it too. We are both SO ready to start writing the chapters of our lives together. We talk about it almost every day. We plan bits and pieces here and there as well. But, we also pray about it, and we wait for it. Jared just got his new job so we are working towards what needs to be done financially and prioritizing things in life right now. It will all come in good time. We did go looking at rings btw. :) I cried when I tried on one of them. It won't be much longer, I can feel it. :)
Oh, yeah, JARED HAS A JOB!!!! Jared FINALLY got hired on as a full time fire fighter with Walker County Fire Department. And we are SOOOO HAPPY!!! It was a major answered prayer and everything about it worked out great! He finished his EMT and should be taking the test soon to get fully certified, got hired, then went through their month long recruit school in November. Let's just say that was a very long month for the both of us. He was wore out! But he survived. =] I know Walker may not be where he stays for his whole firefighting career, but I know for now, its exactly what we needed and exactly what God planned. And Jared loves every minute of it. =]
With the New Year rolling in, Jared and I have been reflecting on so many things we want to improve in our lives. Its very exciting. I don't really want to say its a "new years resolution" because to me its more of a working progress that we started a long time ago, we just keep adding to it and changing some of it as we go along. One of the things we are definitely doing this year is running. We both started running a year or 2 ago but never got into a pattern of it and it kinda comes and goes in spurts. So, we have decided to be consistent with it and sign up for our first 5k. I am very excited about this one. Especially for the health aspect. I am SO loving the path I am taking to be a healthier person, and Jared and I both are working on cutting out more unhealthy items, eating healthier items, and exercising on a daily basis. We have been doing pretty good! Well, except for the junk food... we totally splurged this holiday season. lol but who doesn't?
Splurging.... ever wanted to splurge money? lol duh, every one has. I am currently looking on Amazon and the American Girl website at all the different American girl items. All 3 of my girls(Bree, Faith, and Jenna) got the doll of the year for 2012, McKenna, for Christmas. They are LOVING American Girls. I still have mine. I want to buy them all SO MUCH STUFF. I never got a ton of items, but I had enough with my doll and I had all the books, so I am thankful for that. But now there are SO many neat things for the dolls and I want to buy them ALL for the girls. lol Bree decided that instead of going shopping for her birthday she wanted to order AG stuff online, which I told her was fine. But it is taking us forever to decide what she wants. I have a feeling Faith and Jenna may do the same. Mitch told me today while Bree was looking on the AG site, "Miss Kristen, I think all I hear is 'American Girl this' and 'American girl that' and its killing me!" LOL I love that boy. He has no idea how easy he has it... I have to brothers and a sister, he only has a sister. ;)
My kiddos are growing up too. Bree turns 7 this weekend. I think her birthday and Mitch's birthday is the hardest on me. They were my first kiddos to watch. I have had Bree since 6 months... so her turning 7 makes my heart ache. I remember rocking her to sleep for nap every time I was over. She was SUCH a precious little baby. Now she is a sweet, sassy, funny little girl who I love talking to. Mitch I had at 4 years, and he was the funniest kid I ever met at 4 yrs old. SUCH a loving heart though. He still has it but doesn't always want to show it. He still has such a wonderful imagination at 10 yrs old. I am going to buy him a sketch book soon. He is getting into drawing, which I LOVE. Faith gets smarter every day, and some days I have to take a step back a remember she is still only 5, will turn 6 in February. The twins, oh my goodness... not so little any more. One and a half and it breaks my heart! They are walking and talking and GROWING! Boy do I love them. Jenna is 5 and growing more gorgeous by the day. She is SUCH a beautiful girl, and so smart. She is definitely taking on the big sister role more and more(even though, like any sister, there are still moments of bickering lol) Last time I was there she helped take care of Jake and did so much stuff on her own I was like WHOA, I am not ready for that! Jake is getting independent as well. "Let me do it," or "I can do it." lol He is such an adorable 3 yr old. He is getting into super heroes as well, so guess who is planning on teaching him SO MUCH? lol I got the most hugs and love from him the last time I was there. I love being missed. And I know they have missed me. It is going to break my heart going back to school Monday. I don't want to cut back hours again!
It;s 12:38.... I really need to be asleep. lol
God showed me something recently that just really made a huge difference in my life and how I handle different situations. He is always there, he is never unchanging. I have always heard that, and I knew that, but I didn't really KNOW that. And in any situation, if I just go to Him, leave it with Him, and trust that He will take care of it, then He will. It may not be the way I like it, or the answer I wanted, but He has a reason for everything. He eventually shows you those reasons as well. He shows how choices I make affect my life, and how they affect others. He shows how every person who walks into my life and steps out of my life was for a reason and what I can learn from it. He shows that how I handle situations makes a HUGE difference in the outcome. He also shows that choosing your battles and letting things go, can be the best thing for your life. Sometimes you have to let things go to see why it wasn't doing good in your life. God has shown me a LOT. And I am excited about the things to come. He has made me stronger and has helped to guard my heart when needed. Its an awesome thing to be able to talk to God. Praying to Him more has been something that I have worked on, because I realized no matter what, He always listens. I am so thankful for a God who loves me so!
I think its time to end this. I have talked enough, even though I have much more I could share. I'll have to save it for another day. Hopefully sooner than usual. I haven't been very consistent with my blogs. Goodnight friends. Hope your New Year is starting of fabulous! Until next time,
<3 K
Why not start off a blog with on of my favorite lines from one of my favorite stories. Alice in Wonderland. It pretty much sums up the essence of this blog. For I have a lot to say, a lot to share, a lot to talk about. So this is your warning, you do not have to read it all.
So, I'm going to start with elaborating on my last days of my 30 days of thankful(since I missed it) I know it was way back in November, but I have it on my heart to share. You'll find out why I missed it soon enough.
I have really missed my blog!
So I left off at day 26. For Brokenness. Monday the 26th, I was ready to quit at everything. I was overwhelmed and frustrated and just ready to stop. I was so tired of school and had completely screwed up on a few things, as well as failed my math test. I had bills to pay and no money, haven't even started a single bit of Christmas shopping or even done my Christmas Cards yet. I had Jared starting the hardest week of his recruit school(his last week) and I have hardly seen him all month(well, I've seen him, but seeing him and actually being able to sit down and talk to him about life is two different things). I was really just struggling with the whole not having me time either. I live in a household of seven, that me time doesn't come very often. There was drama all around of course and 1000000 worries that I really shouldn't have been worrying about. Not to mention I have gained back some of my weight on my waist and haven't been to work outs the whole month... so I feel just GREAT..... and I am battling my sinus crud that I never get rid of. Winter just really kills me. I was so tired and so done. I just cried and cried and went to bed. It was ugly. I didn't elaborate on FB, but I was ready to just be done. Thankfully, I was sane enough that I listened to that little voice that said, "Prayers work." And I took a little pity on myself and asked for some. And then before I cried myself to sleep I just sobbed to God. I was upset and mad and just letting him have it. And that's what I needed to do all along. Yeah, he knows, but he wants to hear it from us. I just wanted Him to make it all better, that I was just so tired and couldn't do this. That I wasn't smart enough or strong enough or confident enough.
God has a way of opening your eyes to many things in life. Tuesday(27th), while sitting in intech training(like a zombie) I decided I would check facebook. Hadn't touched it since last night and really didn't even feel like talking to people or anything, but I looked anyways. God puts every person you know in your life there for a reason. The first thing I checked was my inbox. Now, backing up a bit, I was on like 4 hrs of sleep, but I woke up on time, made it to intech early with coffee and everything(in my favorite pink princess cup), I even looked halfway decent for jeans and a hoodie. I could breath(which is rare these days) and my ride to school was filled with some amazing music on the radio, that just kinda gave me a push. Pretty good morning, unlike the norm. Actually, AMAZING morning that I haven't had in a long time. My school morning since October had been nothing but trouble. Anyways, back to my inbox, I have a message from a former preschool parent, who I haven't talked to in a while, and her message was short and sweet, and exactly what I needed. In her encouragement and prayers for me, she said, "Holly Stockburger is with you, and she has been your inspiration to do everything you have planned for your life." Guess who had to leave the class bc I was about to bawl in front of everyone? But she was right. God had allowed Holly to get me through the morning. It took me a moment to realize that I had not set my alarm the night before, and something woke me up before the time it would usually go off(this NEVER happens, I'm always late. lol). I ironically was wearing pink that day(I know, pink is my favorite, but I don't always wear it that much). The drive to school had played one of the songs from her memorial service, I Will Rise. While digging in my purse for my earrings before going in the building, The pink ribbon I wore for Holly was tangled in my earrings(not bad, just attached.). Tons of little signs, little things that made a difference in my day, that I had really not even payed attention to until after I read that message. Holly would have kicked my tail if she even heard me breathe a word about quitting, or beating myself up the way I was. And I know she taught me, and quite a few other girls, how to fight, how to keep going, how to be strong. She never once let us quit at anything we did, and always made sure we were doing it to our best ability. She knew that God placed a special talent in each of us girls, and reminded us of that. She, like many others I look up to, told me that I am going to be one of the best teachers one day, to keep going. I would never in m life want to disappoint that lady. EVER. Especially, when she is one of the role models that I strive to be like.
The rest of the day I just did a lot of deep thinking. Not only that, but I enjoyed the day. I realized, even though I still wasn't back to 100%, that I was ok. I made it thru that week and I am here on another one. And I had no reason to still be down, because I had so much to be happy about. It was an awesome day. A lot of my friends in block one and myself went to eat together for a sit down lunch and just had a good time finishing out our day with the intech crap(yeah... that was boring). Day 27(the Tuesday that I was just talking about) goes to my Block. I am so thankful for the group of people that I am stuck with for the next year and a half. I get along with almost all of them(there is just one that I don't happen to get along with so well... but he doesn't really get along with anyone... thankfully, he's switching sections. lol) I have made some wonderful friendships and I am blessed to have such a great section to be in. We would not have made it through the semester with anyone else. We all kinda helped each other pass. because we ALL were just dragging right there at the end. I was shown that I definitely was not the only one who felt like giving up. These people are becoming like family, and I wouldn't trade them for the world. I know we can make it. =]
As the week went on, I was slowly healing in my heart, but by Wednesday I felt like I was dying bc of my sinuses. It was a long day at school and then I forgot that I had to teach workouts. Let me remind you again, that I haven't really been the whole month of November just because school was absolutely overtaking every inch of my being. Needless to say, teaching when you feel like poo and when your endurance isn't where it needs to be, SUCKS. lol I felt SO horrible, and kept apologizing to the class. They are precious though. It felt so good to have them be excited for my return and to tell me that they have missed my smiling face. And even though I think the workout wasn't as good as it could have been, they left sweating and said it was great. Day 28 was for the Fitness at Work program. I am so thankful for everyone who comes to be a part of this wonderful program, and for all the other instructors. I realized that becoming a part of this was something that I needed. I feel so much better when I am there, I am having fun and getting healthy and fit. I am learning and teaching(which blows my mind that I haven't been here a year and I am already certified in Zumba and now working towards my AFFA! Diane really has pushed me!) I just feel so good, and I love how I look because of it. I was almost out of all my 9/10s in October. Of course I kept them bc I knew November would kill me. But its going back down. =]
Day 29 was for the one constant in my life, my Lord and Savior. I sit back and think of how far I have come in my life and how I would never have made it if it weren't for His guidance, His strength, His love. I am so amazed at the blessings God has given me, the hard times He has brought me through, the many things He has shown me, and is STILL showing me today. It is still so hard to fathom how someone could love someone like me, even after all the times I have failed. He is always there, no matter how many people enter and leave my life, no matter how many times I am hurting or grieving, no matter how many times I drift off the correct path. What an awesome God we serve. And how amazing will it be to be with Him one day. I know Holly is having the best time. <3
Day 30 was for these 30 days of thanks. A lot of people do this every year, but a lot of people don't get it, and think its silly. There are those who are like "we should be thankful every day of the year, not just one month" yeah, well, can you honestly say that you sit down every day and think of something you are thankful for? I mean really.... come on. I love doing this every year because it makes you more aware of the Lords blessings in your life. It does get you thinking about what all we have to be thankful for and CAN get you in a routine of making this an every day task. Its my challenge to everyone. We all have so much to be thankful for.
Now to catch up on some other life events....
As most of you already know or have figured out from reading my blog, my dear friend and role model Holly Stockburger passed away in October. I cannot even tell you how much it hurt, and still hurts, when I think about her being gone. I miss her every day. She fought so hard against the cancer, and I will never forget being told that she didn't lose the battle, she won. She is no longer suffering, no longer in pain, and she is celebrating on the streets of heaven with our God. I fight my battles every day with the reminder of how she fought. I cannot wait to see her again. And I am so thankful to have her loving family as a part of my life. Especially Chris. He is so precious, and he loved more than anyone can imagine. I am thankful for another wonderful role model in my life. And I will always be thinking about the role model I have watching down on me from heaven. She is my guardian angel, along with a few other girls that I love so much. <3
Speaking of Cancer and how absolutely evil it is, My papa's cancer went in remission end of summer into fall. They found hernia right at the end of his esophagus that we think may be keeping him from completely regaining the strength to swallow(he is swallowing now, but can't swallow many foods). He is on a feeding tube and feels much better, and is still trying new things. I am praying that my family starts asking the right questions and getting him back in to remove the hernia, get rid of feeding tube, and get him back on the road to Vanderbilt like planned to do the blood work they were going to do to make sure he is cancer free(I think they were going to clean it? Its like some major thing). Idk what is going to happen though, bc no one seems concerned about it. But, If you know my family on that side....
My grandpa(dad's dad) found out about 2 months ago that his prostate cancer is back. =[ They are more than likely doing the major surgery for that. I am so not liking any of it but I trust that the Drs know what they are doing. It just makes me nauseous to think about any one going through any thing like this, esp my family.
Switching gears to something not so depressing, I survived my first semester in the Education program!!! ONLY A YEAR AND A HALF LEFT!!! Lord I hope I can make it. We all were ready to throw in the towel right there at the end. You wouldn't believe some if the ridiculous things we have to do(10 page lesson plans included... who does that?!?!) I actually did learn SO much though, and even though I DRED starting on Monday, I am a little excited. =] I miss my mean girls and the fun we have with everyone in our block. I am also ready to see some new teachers. Also happy to have a break from Orenda..... Unfortunately, we will have Kumi again... he is the most unorganized professor I have ever met. He really drove us crazy. Thankfully, he's nice. Just irritating. lol I have to get a move on and order some books and organize my folders. I haven't touched a thing since the last day of class. lol
My sister turned 16 on Dec 21st. Reality set in and I realized that I am old. Old age wise, but not heart wise. lol She is growing up, Andrew is growing up, and Michael is pretty much grown up(although, like myself, we both still have areas that we need to grow up in. lol) I have been looking through pictures of when we were younger and its like where did it all go? Remember when life was that simple, that fun? I miss it. And I love the time that I get to spend with them now. We have played epic battles of Mario Kart over the break. I LOVE it.
Sometimes it makes me want to go back to when I was young, but then I think about all the wonderful things I have to look forward to. A degree, a real job, marriage, a place of our own, children of our own. <3 Yes, I have full blown wedding fever. and Jared has it too. We are both SO ready to start writing the chapters of our lives together. We talk about it almost every day. We plan bits and pieces here and there as well. But, we also pray about it, and we wait for it. Jared just got his new job so we are working towards what needs to be done financially and prioritizing things in life right now. It will all come in good time. We did go looking at rings btw. :) I cried when I tried on one of them. It won't be much longer, I can feel it. :)
Oh, yeah, JARED HAS A JOB!!!! Jared FINALLY got hired on as a full time fire fighter with Walker County Fire Department. And we are SOOOO HAPPY!!! It was a major answered prayer and everything about it worked out great! He finished his EMT and should be taking the test soon to get fully certified, got hired, then went through their month long recruit school in November. Let's just say that was a very long month for the both of us. He was wore out! But he survived. =] I know Walker may not be where he stays for his whole firefighting career, but I know for now, its exactly what we needed and exactly what God planned. And Jared loves every minute of it. =]
With the New Year rolling in, Jared and I have been reflecting on so many things we want to improve in our lives. Its very exciting. I don't really want to say its a "new years resolution" because to me its more of a working progress that we started a long time ago, we just keep adding to it and changing some of it as we go along. One of the things we are definitely doing this year is running. We both started running a year or 2 ago but never got into a pattern of it and it kinda comes and goes in spurts. So, we have decided to be consistent with it and sign up for our first 5k. I am very excited about this one. Especially for the health aspect. I am SO loving the path I am taking to be a healthier person, and Jared and I both are working on cutting out more unhealthy items, eating healthier items, and exercising on a daily basis. We have been doing pretty good! Well, except for the junk food... we totally splurged this holiday season. lol but who doesn't?
Splurging.... ever wanted to splurge money? lol duh, every one has. I am currently looking on Amazon and the American Girl website at all the different American girl items. All 3 of my girls(Bree, Faith, and Jenna) got the doll of the year for 2012, McKenna, for Christmas. They are LOVING American Girls. I still have mine. I want to buy them all SO MUCH STUFF. I never got a ton of items, but I had enough with my doll and I had all the books, so I am thankful for that. But now there are SO many neat things for the dolls and I want to buy them ALL for the girls. lol Bree decided that instead of going shopping for her birthday she wanted to order AG stuff online, which I told her was fine. But it is taking us forever to decide what she wants. I have a feeling Faith and Jenna may do the same. Mitch told me today while Bree was looking on the AG site, "Miss Kristen, I think all I hear is 'American Girl this' and 'American girl that' and its killing me!" LOL I love that boy. He has no idea how easy he has it... I have to brothers and a sister, he only has a sister. ;)
My kiddos are growing up too. Bree turns 7 this weekend. I think her birthday and Mitch's birthday is the hardest on me. They were my first kiddos to watch. I have had Bree since 6 months... so her turning 7 makes my heart ache. I remember rocking her to sleep for nap every time I was over. She was SUCH a precious little baby. Now she is a sweet, sassy, funny little girl who I love talking to. Mitch I had at 4 years, and he was the funniest kid I ever met at 4 yrs old. SUCH a loving heart though. He still has it but doesn't always want to show it. He still has such a wonderful imagination at 10 yrs old. I am going to buy him a sketch book soon. He is getting into drawing, which I LOVE. Faith gets smarter every day, and some days I have to take a step back a remember she is still only 5, will turn 6 in February. The twins, oh my goodness... not so little any more. One and a half and it breaks my heart! They are walking and talking and GROWING! Boy do I love them. Jenna is 5 and growing more gorgeous by the day. She is SUCH a beautiful girl, and so smart. She is definitely taking on the big sister role more and more(even though, like any sister, there are still moments of bickering lol) Last time I was there she helped take care of Jake and did so much stuff on her own I was like WHOA, I am not ready for that! Jake is getting independent as well. "Let me do it," or "I can do it." lol He is such an adorable 3 yr old. He is getting into super heroes as well, so guess who is planning on teaching him SO MUCH? lol I got the most hugs and love from him the last time I was there. I love being missed. And I know they have missed me. It is going to break my heart going back to school Monday. I don't want to cut back hours again!
It;s 12:38.... I really need to be asleep. lol
God showed me something recently that just really made a huge difference in my life and how I handle different situations. He is always there, he is never unchanging. I have always heard that, and I knew that, but I didn't really KNOW that. And in any situation, if I just go to Him, leave it with Him, and trust that He will take care of it, then He will. It may not be the way I like it, or the answer I wanted, but He has a reason for everything. He eventually shows you those reasons as well. He shows how choices I make affect my life, and how they affect others. He shows how every person who walks into my life and steps out of my life was for a reason and what I can learn from it. He shows that how I handle situations makes a HUGE difference in the outcome. He also shows that choosing your battles and letting things go, can be the best thing for your life. Sometimes you have to let things go to see why it wasn't doing good in your life. God has shown me a LOT. And I am excited about the things to come. He has made me stronger and has helped to guard my heart when needed. Its an awesome thing to be able to talk to God. Praying to Him more has been something that I have worked on, because I realized no matter what, He always listens. I am so thankful for a God who loves me so!
I think its time to end this. I have talked enough, even though I have much more I could share. I'll have to save it for another day. Hopefully sooner than usual. I haven't been very consistent with my blogs. Goodnight friends. Hope your New Year is starting of fabulous! Until next time,
<3 K
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